And what can I do to find some peace and calm in my life?

 

At work and in your relationship you’re the fixer, the doer. You’re the one who Makes. Shit. Happen.

And you’re exhausted.

Everyone counts on you because you’re so capable, and you’ve always been proud to be that person. The one that everyone can rely on. But more and more, you don’t have the time or energy for the things you love– like working out, or reading a good book. Hell, you barely have the energy to binge-watch your favorite show on Netflix! 

You’d love to have a relationship that supports and nurtures you, but even if you are partnered right now, you feel disconnected and alone. You may even find yourself experiencing symptoms of a panic attack. You’ve been stressed out before, but it’s never gotten this bad. Something’s gotta give.

You long for Peace. Clarity. Connection.

COVID-19 UPDATE: I’ve been offering online therapy to individuals and couples for years! Click here to learn all about just how easy it is to do therapy from your home while you shelter in place!

 
 

Peace

Life in Los Angeles can be fast and furious, and is often overwhelming. When friends ask how we’re doing, we automatically say, “Busy!”. It used to be a good thing. You felt like you were doing something important. You were important. Now it’s hard to see the point. You want to be valued for something other than being industrious. You want to value yourself for something other than being busy.

I can teach you skills and techniques to slow it all down. We won’t just practice the basics – deep breathing, mindfulness, meditation– you’ve probably tried that already, anyway. Those techniques are great for calming the nervous system when you first start to feel anxious, but you can’t always catch it in time.

I use cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), an evidence-based technique to combat anxiety, and also some more non-traditional methods. We will address the “meta-anxiety”– namely the anxiety about your anxiety. The little voice that says, “The deep breathing and CBT aren’t going to work and your anxiety is going to mess up this important event” or, “You are always going to feel this way. You are just an anxious person and you can’t do anything about that", or "Another panic attack is going to humiliate you in front of your friends or co-workers".

It doesn’t need to be that way

I have worked with many people who felt just the way you are feeling right now. They have learned to manage their anxiety so that they feel comfortable going about their everyday lives, and confident that they can successfully negotiate stressful moments the way they want to.

Clarity

Wouldn’t you like to understand how you came to be the way you are?

Looking at the patterns in your life since you were a small child can help you understand the places where you get stuck as an adult. And this understanding will transform how you feel about yourself – you will see how the things you did as a child were important to your emotional survival. You will learn to have empathy for your young self, and appreciate the strength you had in managing your life however you needed to at the time.

Chances are that the very characteristics that now get you stuck, are just the flip side of the characteristics that make you successful so much of the time.

Are you a go-getter?

You know what you want and you pursue it until you achieve it. You stand out for your age and experience– you are determined and hard-working. At the same time, you secretly feel like it’s never enough to make you feel really good about yourself. If everyone really knew who you were, they would never think so highly of you. You are afraid that one day it will all come crashing down.

Are you super easy-going?

Going with the flow makes you the one everyone likes- and the one everyone calls to ask for a favor. It’s getting to be overwhelming. You want to speak up for yourself but are afraid no one will like you any more if you don’t agree with them. And you secretly feel like you don’t really deserve to stand up for yourself. But the frustration and the anger are building up inside and you don’t know what to do about it.

Sometimes you may want to process some of your childhood memories with AF-EMDR, a technique in which I have specialized training. EMDR can help you take traumatic childhood memories and replace difficult images, feelings, and sensations with positive, soothing, and empowering ones.

My clients find that understanding their history leads to a deep sense of personal acceptance and increased self-esteem and confidence.

Connection

Humans are social animals. This means that we crave a deep connection with another human being–a connection on a soul level, where we love and cherish each other for who we really are–warts and all. When we don't have this kind of connection, we can feel not only lonely and isolated, but anxious, stressed out, angry, or depressed.

When our relationships with other people are strained, this leads to anxiety as well. Sometimes when you think you are stressed out at work, the main source of stress is actually in your relationship with your partner or a significant family member. Working on our relationships reduces the level of anxiety that shows up everywhere in our lives.

Here’s where to go if you’d like to learn more about how you can reduce your relationship anxiety, and create a loving supportive partnership.

Worrying about Everything

Practical Help

Let’s face it; sometimes we are stressed simply because we have so much to do and don’t even know where to begin. A little organization can be tremendously therapeutic!

I have specific ways of helping you organize your life so that your schedule and your to-do list won’t seem overwhelming. You’ll know just what to do and why, in order to live your life according to your own personal values and beliefs. I can teach you a way to use values-based planning to organize your life and plan your day, your year, and your future.

Are you ready to find your peace?

I offer anxiety therapy both in my Los Angeles office, and online anywhere in California.

Call me at 323-999-1537, or email me at amy@thrivetherapyla.com, to set up your free in-office or phone consultation. Or skip the phone tag, and go directly to my on-line schedule by clicking on the button below. I look forward to talking to you soon!